Dismantle Your Internal False Alarms

The other night my fire alarm went off while I was away from home. It didn’t stop sounding, so my kind neighbor had the fire department come to potentially rescue my dog and our building. They broke my locks and inspected the premises only to find a faulty fire alarm, which they dismantled for me. It brought great comfort to know that my home was safe. My neighbor and I exchanged phone numbers and keys so we could quickly help each other if there was ever a need, and my fire alarm and door locks were replaced.

This got me thinking about the built-in false alarms that nearly all of us have within ourselves, which cause us to feel stressed (anxious, angry, frustrated, guilty, worried). There are times when our bodies and minds respond to conflicts or situations that appear to be difficult by going into survival mode through a stress response, even though the situations are not matters of life or death.

This is because our systems are still evolving. When humans were first on earth, we were living in caves and relied on our instincts to keep us alive. Our systems were designed to activate a stress response when danger was approaching so action could be taken for protection. In this process, one part of the system recruits energy from the rest so that instead of focusing on work, relaxed living, nurturing, or joyful activities, we focus on surviving and the adrenalin pumps through us, urging us to act quickly or paralyzing us so we can’t act (hence, the times when you just can’t think of a good response or make a response).

We now live in a time in when most of us are in cushy offices and fairly safe places (I’m excluding obvious professions that involve danger.), yet our survival mechanisms are kicking in on a daily or weekly basis even when physical survival is not at risk. Indeed, an email or a phone call or even a slow car in front of us preventing us from being on time may trigger this response. Our systems equate conflicts or challenges related to our jobs with survival since we make money with our jobs, which is needed for survival. Our systems and minds don’t naturally stop to think about whether survival mode is needed to help you succeed in a particular instance. That time could be wasted if you truly needed to survive.

The problem with this is that when we are in this mode, we cannot focus and think clearly. Our creative intuitive minds are blocked. And, yet, in order to solve most of the challenges that come before us (communication, conflicts, work challenges, etc.) in our jobs, we must be relaxed so that we can think clearly and devise wise solutions or see the solutions that may be unfolding.

Even the times when we get slowed down can contain wisdom that we may not see. Those who were late to work on the day the Twin Towers were hit and survived certainly know this wisdom. There are other times when our schedules get rearranged, and we meet someone or learn of an opportunity that we would have missed if we were not slowed down. Solutions and insights coming through inspiration arrive the same way: It’s important to slow down.

I was reminded of this importance of slowing down when I received one of those clever tickets in the mail recently. Feeling angry was my first response. Then, I stepped back and thought about how fast I had been moving lately in certain areas of my life: Perhaps too fast to see the larger picture. (For the record, I’m not promoting those cameras, but I got the message.)

I’ll talk more about how the mind forms triggers to set off false alarms in my next blog, but for today, I leave you with a tip on how to help reverse this habitual survival stress response to non-life threatening events. To go back to my original story, this will help you to change your fire alarm and locks and increase your communication with your internal compass so you can receive clear guidance and inspiration to create solutions to the challenges before you. In essence, you’ll be exchanging phone numbers and keys with your internal guide as you learn to relax into your day.
 

TIP: Next time a non-life threatening event triggers a stress response (any negative emotion, anxiety, frustration, blood pressure rising, feeling of urgency), discipline yourself to stop from taking action or freezing tightly. Take a deep breath and try this:

Relaxing Harmonizer: 

• Place your right fingers in a notch putting your fingers tips together and put your finger tips gently on your left side of your body, under your armpit (find a tender spot and put it there).
• Place your left fingers in a notch and put them on your sternum (center of your chest).
• Leave them in place for at least one minute (can go longer if you have more time; longer is better).
• Then switch sides for 1 minute or more.
• Do this one as many times as you can per day to help reverse the habit (go for at least three times per day or at least any time you feel that stress response); it’s also great to do when falling asleep or when you wake up in the morning. Not only will it calm you, but it increases your ability to metabolize more than just food: emotions, life events, information, etc. So, you might also try doing it after you eat. 

Bridgenosis® Happenings:

• Read about Bridgenosis® sessions involving creative conflict resolution, stress-reducing techniques, and hypnotherapy for individuals and organizational leaders atwww.bridgneosis.com or contact Laura Palmer with questions atlaura@bridgenosis.com or by phone at 202-709-6013. In-person, phone, and SKYPE appointments are available
• Classes at Radiance Yoga in Old Town Alexandria, www.radiance-yoga.net: